Sunday, 14 December 2008

The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things...

Life has continued since I last posted and the world and his aunty have had adventures. And they took me along.

However there were no shoes/ships/ceiling wax/cabbages/kings. Although It would have been nice, I would think. And I would say that pigs almost certainly do have wings.

But alas, back to my life of escapade after escapade.

Dastardly adventure number 1: Tacky Practice and the preparations for said adventure. Tacky practice is a rugby tradition that largely involves making an idiot of yourself. For some people, this is accompanied by copious amounts of alcohol. I am fortunate enough not to require any alcohol to make a complete and utter idiot of myself. The week before tacky practice, every senior on the team is entitled to making three demands of the rookies; these ranged from the provision of baked goods, being woken up in the morning, putting up banners telling the world how wonderful our rugby seniors are etc... I, being both a rookie (ish) and a senior got to see the best of both worlds. I was allowed one demand, but had to fulfill the demands of the other seniors. So... we expeditioned to Smith College, our rivals, and chalked 'MHC Rugby was here' all over their campus, and wore shirts that said 'Smith is so not cool'. We also put up posters of one of the other seniors telling the students of Smith how wonderful she is. Tacky practice happened on the Thursday, and the requirement is to dress as something tacky. I became a 'chav', a concept completely unbeknownst to these Americany folk. And I was pregnant for an evening. It was utterly fantastic. At tacky practice some demands were fulfilled, mine included. I demanded that the rookies arrived, taped together in a line by their ankles. They didn't quite meet the challenge, taking 15 minutes to walk about 1 foot, but it was fun watching. We also performed a beautifully choreographed dance to 'Wannabe' by the Spice Girls.

Dastardly Adventure number 2: Rugby banquet. My second adventure was also rugby related and happened the following day. The rugby banquet is also a bi-annual event which happens, and we all dress up nicely and eat and receive awards. NB: the awards are largely ridiculous, thus fitting in well with pretty much everything the rugby team does. My award was presented by El Capitan Margot Wade, and says on it: 'The Penguin Award; Too Legit de Quidt.' In summary, my shin splints make me run like a penguin and I am practically a real American now as I have been to the Seven Eleven.

Dastardly Adventure number 3: FEAST. This was possibly the best moment of my life so far. Or one of. Another aspect of my Americanness is that my life almost entirely revolves around food now. A night came along, much to general distress and peril, when we couldn't decide which dining hall to grace with our wondrous presence for dinner. By 'we' I mean the Fantastic Four: Emma, Christina, Moni and myself. So, we split up willy nilly and with gay abandon and went to different dining halls, used our meal swipes and collected large quantities of the coveted foods and took them away in 'To Go' containers, back to Buckland common room. We laid out a picnic rug and gorged ourselves and almost died from the amount of food. Foods consumed included: cheese tortellini, garlic cheese bread, chicken, mashed potatoes with gravy, grilled cheese sandwiches, tomato soup, waffles with assorted toppings, omelettes, vegetable lo mein, fried rice, 40+ mini egg rolls (Tamar fetched us some more) and ice cream. And then we all groaned and lay on the floor and discussed the necessity of hibernation.

Dastardly Adventure number 4: Thanksgiving. I visited four different states in one day: Massachusetts, Conneticut, Maryland, Virginia. I went to see Liz, Virginia-Ann and family in Virginia. And had lunch with all the wonderful guidey-types that I met at SWInG in the summer. And it was wonderful. I experienced a real American Thanksgiving and Black Friday. AND on the way back to Baltimore to get the flight home, we visited Washington D.C. and went to the Natural History Museum. Fantastic. Plus I got to spend a few days playing with dogs and children. And ate a lot.

Dastardly Adventure number 5: Vespers. Christmas is coming, the goose is getting fat... I didn't put a penny in the old man's hat. But I did sing a lot. We did three Vespers concerts - one in New York City and two in our very own Abbey Chapel on campus. They went well, and I got to go on an adventure to New York, and bought a penguin hat. AND, when we sang in Abbey Chapel I got to wear a rose pinned to my nun outfit because I am a senior-type thing. Or at least someone posing as a senior.

Dastardly Adventure number 6: Hot Chocolate Run. I ran 5km in aid of victims of domestic violence. I wore fleece-lined spandex and the penguin hat and it was fantastic. Sadly my shin splints let me down and I had to walk some of it, so it took me 35 mins and 35 seconds. We had magic computer chips attached to us to time when we crossed the start and the finish, and when we were done they gave us hot chocolate and oranges and cookies. And mugs. And there was a man wearing a penguin suit and he liked my hat. And then Mickey realised that she had lost her phone. She had left it in her registration pack, which had been thrown away, so I climbed into a dumpster and sorted through sacks of rubbish to locate her phone and wallet. And I am now a hero. And someone took a photo of me in the giant dustbin for a local newspaper. Strange.

Dastardly Adventure number 7: SNOW. There was snow. Not much, and it didn't last very long, but it happened. We saw from inside our sauna (the heating in my room is aggressively over-enthusiastic), and ran outside and screamed and danced at 12.30am. It was fantastic. The penguin came along for the ride.

And now exams are upon me and death is involved. Much work which I am not a fan of. But I got to write a play, which was enormous fun to write. It is about our futile existence, and what has become of the Fantastic Four now that winter is well and truly upon us. Basically, we sit indoors and don't do our homework. And talk about food. If I have time I may post extracts up here at some point.

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